TUMMLIN YER WULKIES by TT (Tammytroot)
Huv ye ever tumelt yer wulkies?
It isnae as bad as it sounds.
It's goat nothin tae dae wi the lassies -
if ye're merried it's no oota bounds.
Naw? Tummlin yer wulkies is easy -
ye don't need tae be super fit.
Ye jist coorie doon oan yer hunkers,
an flip ower oan yer back, then a bit
O a push an a shove, an ye've done it.
Ye're landit back up oan yer knees.
It's simple tae tummel yer wulkies -
most people kin dae it wi ease.
Ma uncle Tam tummelt his wulkies. Well,
at least ma uncle Tam tried.
But, ma uncle Tam's kinna - fleshy -
a bit oan the hefty side.
When his bum hit the flerr it wis frightnin -
aw the pictures fell affy the wa.
The wean startit screamin - we wur aw trampolinin -
an Tam's knees kept oan beltin his jaw.
He wis jist like a big daud o rubber
that sumbdy hud bounced aff the grun
An the harder he stoatit, the higher we floatit.
Ah'm tellin yese , it wis nae fun!
The poor dug wis daein a tap dance,
wee Whiskers wis daein the jive,
And - honest, nae lyin - the goldfish were flyin!
We wur lucky tae come oot alive.
Next day ah'm readin the paper,
an ah sees a wee bit doon the side
Sayin, "Glasgow is hit by earth tremor,
but scientists cannot decide
Whether it started in Turkey, or possibly it came from Siam."
But two people know where it startit......Me, an ma uncle Tam.
GlescaPal TT ( Tammytroot)
Glasgow, joined June 2004
This is wan o me when a
wis aboot 5yrs (c1953)
taken in Jerome's oot the toon.
It wis a black an white photo,
but ah retouched it,
as annaB suggested,
an coloured it in.